Believe In Me

Wouldn't it be a great world if you could believe in people. Was there ever a time when you could believe in people emotions as being truthful. And if so, what happen. These days I am so tired and stressed that I have developed amazing powers of paranoia. I can see right through people. Yes. I can see bull shit as if it was a turd flowing right out of one's mouth trying to disguise itself as honesty with pretty colors.

All things start out with the best intentions. "Believe In Me", is the battle cry. Too bad it's the one war that doesn't have a positive out come.

Damn, I've gone abstract!

Oxford Comma

I don't know, maybe it is stress that's working it's way through my mind at the moment or it could be I am just getting sick of hearing people say I am not sure if am going.

What am I talking about. Los Angeles of course. I thought by now people would have dropped the silly answer when asked whether or not they are going to L.A. Only a limited number of people were lucky enough to be ask to go, and that alone should be a good reason to say with pride they are going. Not to mention the fact that jobs aren't exactly falling out of trees at the moment.

But lets not forget what they will be a part of. It's the Tonight Show. Aside from SNL, it's a television staple. The chance to work on such a show doesn't come often and may likely be a once in your life time event.

Why would this be a topic worth writing about. Well it's starting to drive me crazy each time people ask me do I know if such and such made up their mind to go yet.

Trust me, if they are walking around right now telling you they are not sure, they're not being truthful. Everyone knew way back in April of '08 if they wanted to to go or not. At this point the only way you wouldn't want to go is if you weren't ask to go. Period.

O'k, maybe that's a comma, since I know of a couple of people who were asked recently but knew well in advance, again since last year, that they didn't want to or couldn't go.

This is an adventure. A scary ass, what the fuck am I doing adventure. Get off the drama train and be happy that you're about to take part in television history.

Wow, I don't believe I just wrote that. So what's really bothering me?...

hmmmm.......

Toys

Last night I ate at a vegetarian restaurant which turned out to be a nice surprise since I've never been there before. The place is called "Home On 8th". It's on 8th avenue near Penn station, a neighborhood peppered with bars and sexy lingerie/dvd stores.

It amazing how you can live in New York and still discover new and interesting places. Last Sunday was another perfect example. I was walking along 2nd avenue going towards St. Marks Place and came across this incredible Japanese toy store, Toy Tokyo. I thought I had died and went to Japanese anime toy heaven.

The store owner claimed they've been in business for over 10 years. How could I have not known about this place in all that time. There were many things worth buying in there but I had to show self control. Since anything I buy now would have to be included in my move. As it stands I will be paying a fortune to move and store the bulk of my toy collection since I will have to rent a small apartment in L.A. to start.

Only a month and a half left before change begin. In a couple of weeks I will head out to L.A. to lock down an apartment, then return to New York, start packing and move out hopefully by the end of March.

I can't help but wonder what the toys and comic shop will be like out there. When I was in San Francisco a couple of years ago with Late Night, after tapings, a friend of mine, Lizzy, took me to some amazing stores in that area. I ended up shipping a hugh box back to New York. Funny, now it's all heading back, out west.

I think this weekend I'll take some finally pictures of my place as it is for memory sake and then start boxing stuff.

As much as I want to do this move I can't help but wonder if this is the right move to make. Will I be happy out there. Will living out there be a positive experience. What new friends will come into my life. What old ones will move on.

One thing for sure, good or bad experiences, there will be new toys and comics stores to discover.

...at least I hope there will be.

Something Has Changed

Have you ever had a period in your life where something seems wrong but you can't quite put your finger on it. It's like you've woken up in an alternate life. All the people are the same but behaviors are different.

Do you confront it or just go along with the new reality and see where it goes.

It's hard to believe only 3 more weeks left and then Late Night with Conan O'Brien is no more, It will be The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien! He's going to be great and I am happy I've been given a chance to be a part of it.

"I gave Them life
I gave Them all
They drained my very soul
...dry
I crushed my heart
to ease Their pains
No thought for me remains there
Nothing can They spare
What of me?

It could be that nerves are just starting to act up. The reality of what I am about to do with my life. Or, I might be right. The world has changed and the aliens are hoping I won't notice.

Remember Dark City?....

It's Crappy Out There!

Right now am sitting here at home this morning waiting for conditions to improve or I should say hoping to improve. Overnight it snowed and waking up this morning at 6:30am it is now and icy mix falling. The ground out side looks like a ice skating rink. Not the best condition for driving. I tried driving in this once a year ago and got into a minor accident. I have no desire of repeating that moment in time.

It's frustrating. I really don't like taking time off unless I really have to. But with weather like this, it doesn't really leave you with much choice. Am going to give it a couple of more hours and then if it still looks bad, I have no choice but to call in and stay home.

And if there was ever a period in time that I didn't want to be stuck at home, this is it. So much to get done. Yesterday was an average good work day. We taped two shows. I did have one really crazy encounter with a staff member though. She flew off the handle like one of those crazy homeless people you'd encounter roaming the streets. She just kept going on and on trying to engage me in her craziness but I just didn't say a word and that unfortunately made her even worst.

To tell the truth, it didn't even phase me. Right now am like a guy who knows he's moving on to something better and no longer has to put up with other people insanity. Though I did find out later that she might be one of the people who wasn't asked to go to L.A., it still doesn't excuse the behavior.

All these years we got along fine and now towards the end to start behaving in this manner. Crazy, I call it.

Aside from work, what was on my mind most of the day was the girlfriend, and of course moving.

It's hard to make sense of online listings without actually being able to see what people are renting out. I've seen some really great listings and a few lemons. Plus I can't do anything during the day, at least not yet till Late Night is over on February 20th. Then I'll fly out for a week and really look for a apartment. Come back and move by the end of March.

Not a lot of time to make such a huge transition. I guess in some way this is best cause by then it's going to be a quick break from New York. No long drawn out departure.

Well, it's 9:02 and it still looks crappy outside. But I am going to give it a try. Cross your fingers and wish me luck. At moments like this you wish you had wealth. Then you could just slip right back under the bed covers and say "Fuck It!"

Later.

I've Been Anally Probed

I was knocked out and probed...

Willingly.

What a way to start a blog. Admitting to being probed in such a manner. But it did happened and I am happier for it.

I had a Colonoscopy. One which was long over due. Everything went well though the doctor did find 4 small polyps which he removed. I won't say it was a close call but I am glad they were found now as oppose to a later date.

My dad died of this cancer 13 years ago, so I'm on the must watch list.

So before I go any further here, I say to all my friends, fans and aliens, if you have members in your family that have or had colon cancer, get check. Forget that age thing and get pass the fear of the probe.

Take care of your business.

So welcome to my blog. This is totally new to me so hang in there as I try to figure out my way around this.

I guess what I will be doing here is sharing my thoughts with you as I am about to take on the biggest change of my life. If you are not aware, I am about to leave my birth coast, New York and move out to Los Angeles, California.

The Late Night staff have offered me the opportunity to go to the west coast and continue working with Conan. I can't begin to express how happy and excited I am. I've been working on Late Night since the beginning, the people for the most part are an extended family. And it's great to know that I will be continuing on with most of them.

But with every great news there is equally bad.

I've fallen in love.

It's weird for me to actually see myself typing these words. In my past I've dated a few people that I really cared for but always felt something was missing. In the last few months this person has filled in a void in my heart. A place that has always been empty and I never really expected it to be filled. It's one of those things in life you just come to except that that's the way it will away be.

So as you can imagine, this move as much as I want to do it, isn't going to be easy and it might come at a huge price to me.

Leaving New York has always been a goal of mine for years. Well before working for Late Night. It's one of those I was born here, don't want to die here things. So in some way, Late Night has saved me. I hope that maybe someday she'll wake up and feel the same and decide to join me. But it's a major decision for anyone to make. And I will always respect and care about her no matter what she decides.

Hopefully in May I will be talking about how great the California sun is and how wonderful it is to have --------- still in my life.

or....