8:31pm

I am so happy tonight. I'd celebrate but there's so many things I have to take care of tonight before I go to sleep.

So what has cause this great mood tonight. Well, after 4 and a half years I finally finished a new dot art piece. And even as I was wrapping this one up I had ideas for other images which I will start work on shortly. Tonight I found a part of me that I felt was lost.

I credit getting this new start on doing my artwork on my coming out to LA and having someone really special in my life right now who's been giving me encouragement to get it done.

As soon as I have time I will post it. I can't wait to start the next image!

What The F**** Happen To Stargate!?!

It's been a while since I've blogged about anything. Life is still strange out here in L.A. But I am slowly making it work for me. I've met a number of cool fans and they all ask the same question, will we ever see a Recliner Of Rage again. My answer is, "I don't know". I hope soon. They were fun to do and I do have a lot of topics to go into since moving out here.

Mentioning topics, there has been something that's bugging me. So I thought I'd share it here. This is raw and un polished like most recliner topics that aired. But it's something I care enough about that it has gotten me to post a new blog.

O'k, here goes...

Because of my past experience with Direct TV I've decided not to get cable service any more. Instead, I now watch DVDs. And since I have a decent size library to choose from, I never feel like I am missing anything.

When I heard about the new Stargate series though I thought I might need to change my stand on getting service. But that has now quickly faded. A few weeks ago I was one of the many who sat through that 2 hour commercial that they called SGU. I say 2 hour commercial cause every 8 to 9 minutes they broke for a 3 to 5 minute commercial run. I saw more produce then I did series. But what little series I saw, I got that gut feeling this wasn't going anywhere fast.

So today, during my lunch break, I turned on the Sci-Fi, no wait, the SyFy channel, and there's these teen girls in a club arguing about some boy and I think to myself, this must be one of those crappy, low budget Saturday evening SyFy movies they are repeating during the weekday. Since I was eating I didn't want to touch the remote so I watched a little more. I must of stepped away for water but when I came back there were two people having sex. Usually that the cue that someone is about to get killed. Imagine my surprise when a few scene later I see a Stargate. This freakin' thing I've been watching was Stargate.

Is someone on crack?

What the hell happened to Stargate? How did a great series that ran for 10 years go from SG1 and Atlantis to this?! I'm looking at a F'd up Battlestar Galactica remake with a stargate prop. I knew they said it not your old Stargate but really... What is this?

Someone needs to send these guys box sets of both shows cause it's obvious who ever created this show has never seen an episode of the classic stuff.

All I can say is thank you Amanda Tapping for staying true to Sci-Fi fans and giving us something worth watching in Sanctuary. It has action, adventure, funny and most important, it's different.

SGU... are they kidding?!

And on that note I am now going to go watch some "REAL", classic SG1 action on DVD!

A Pretty Girl Squeezed My Butt Cheek!

So just when I started seeing the dark side of the world suddenly I had a week like the one that just past. First off, I really have to thank Howard Shum. Not only is he a great artist but a great person as well. His friendship during this adjustment to moving to Los Angeles has been extremely appreciated.

Thanks to him, I was introduced to the Drink and Draw group out here. An incredible group of artists and non artists all sharing one common thing, creativity. Since I started attending their gatherings, a fire was lit in me, a drive thats been sleeping for the last few years.

After not doing any dot artworks for over 8 years, this past weekend I did a portrait. I actually filled some of my Koh-I-Noor pens with ink, put on some of my Howard Stern tapes from 1998 and created art. It's a simple image but a huge start for me. To actually be excited about creating art again, what a great feeling!



But the weekend was just part of this fantastic week. Tuesday I went to a drawing class, no instructor. This was about the 3rd time attending this class. There was a model doing various poses.

Wednesday was Drink and Draw. Spoke with a couple of really interesting artist there.

Then there was Thursday. I went and discovered downtown LA Art Walk, thanks to someone name Vanessa who works at the Martin Lawrence Gallery in City Walk. She had mentioned this one time per month event to me a couple of times in the past but I kept missing it.

This month I made it... And all I can say is WOW! Approximately 39 galleries open all night showing all kind of artworks. I've never seen anything like this. The only thing more impressive than the number of galleries taking part in this is the crowd of people. It was one big party of people appreciating art and socializing. And my luck, I was there with two very knowledgeable people on art. Talk about an evening of discovering and learning.

And to wrap up the week, Friday. After work I attended a 4 hour drawing class. 3 models dressed in Hawaiian outfits, with music, and food. I've never gone to a class that went on till midnight. This was a lot of fun.

Hand down this has been the best week I've had since moving out here to LA. I feel so connected to art right now. This was what I felt was missing for me back in New York. Back there it was an occasional hit and miss. Out here, creativity is everywhere. And I am taking it all in like a sponge.

But if all this incredible exposure to creativity and art wasn't enough to put me in an amazing state of mind, I encountered Susie Wednesday night. A really cute girl who happened to be a fan of Late Night and the Tonight Show. I met her on the way home from Drink and Draw on Sunset Blvd. Some light flirting went on. And while taking a picture together, my butt cheek was squeezed. This cute, hot girl squeezed my butt cheek! She made my night.



I can only wish that everywhere I went in LA a different girl would come up to me and take a squeeze while we take a picture. What a life that would be. But that fantasy aside, being able to draw every week and be exposed to this much art is just what I needed. And I know there is so much more to to discover here.

I've included some of my drawings from this week and a few from previous weeks.

What a great week!

Just A Thought

This entry might be a bit disturbing to read. So if you have strong religious beliefs you just might want to skip reading this.

You've been warned.

Recently a lot has been going on with me, some not great and it's made me start reflecting on my life so far and where I think it's going. I took a trip home last week (yeah, which home) to see family and friends and just to be around the core value system I had before coming to L.A.

Don't think for a moment that somehow I am regretting moving here. I know coming out west was absolutely the right choice at this point in my life. But I guess being so new to the environment I've already encountered a few questionable people here. On top of that a few health scares and I guess you start seeing the world in a fourth dimension.

My mortality has been on my mind and if I should die at this moment all the things I stand to lose. Material things like the toys I've been collecting for the last few years but more importantly friendship formed through year of nurturing. At that moment of dying all these thoughts probably would be flooding my mind at once, fighting for that last recall, like a person who's about to drown trying to get that last breathe in.

I know at this point you're thinking well you have to have faith in God, the after life, the spirit world, other realms of existence. But what if death is as simple as what is in front of us. Like a leaf, you grow and die, the end. Every thought you ever had gone. Fearing death would probably make sense if you felt you had a lot to live for.

While in New York a friend of mine was telling me about someone who had a family member who's developing Alzheimer. And while I listened to her tell me about how upset the family was, etc. I could help but think, is Alzheimer really all that bad.

Here's a disease as we call it that slowly robs you of your memory. To the point you might even forget how to wipe your own ass. I know with out a doubt this has to be horrible and stressful for a family to watch a love one go through this. But from the patient side, I wonder, are they being better prepared to deal with death. How can you fear something you no longer understand. And how can you fear losing something if you have no memories of ever having it to begin with.

If you're looking for a point to this, there isn't, remember I told you from the start that at the moment I am seeing the world in a fourth dimension.

Though if you really need a point to this, here it is. Even though you may lose all memories of who you are and the people you know. They on the other hand will more than likely remember you. So I guess if anything try to leave some memories behind. A few good ones if possible.

The Standard

I've gotten the chance to be in some interesting bits from time to time. A few weeks ago we shot something at the Standard Hotel on Sunset. In the lobby of this hotel is a glass booth with an incredibly attractive girl inside. She spend the day just lying there in the booth reading or surfing on line in sleep wear.

Sounds great huh, only in L.A.

Well, guess who got to go into the booth with this beautiful woman, yours truly. For about 2 hours, we were in there together looking at some of my comic book collection, looking at some of my View Master collect. And playing with a Lego set. I even got to do a sketch of Grace which I then signed and gave her.

Unfortunately, I found out that the bit will never make air. It was cut. But I prepared for that very possibility. How many times in any guys life time will he ever find himself in a glass booth for a couple of hours with an attractive girl, zero (unless he's paying for it). To have it documented in video
would have been good but I have photos, better.

So here are a couple of photos from that fantasy shoot.

Now the next stop this weekend, "San Diego Comic Con!"

I Don't Understand

Yesterday it happened again. I was about to leave to meet someone for sushi around 2pm. As I opened the door. The snoopy piano started playing the peanut song. Nothing touched it, no wind, light, nothing. It just started playing and stopped when it was done.

I tried to repeat my steps but it didn't start again. I tried stomping my foot tapping the cabinet it sits on, open, close the door hard. A few weeks back when we had that earthquake, that didn't set it off either.

I am not big on the ghost thing, But you have to admit this is very strange. Unless you touch the key on the piano, it doesn't do a thing.

Actually the last couple of weeks have been a bit unusual. There have been moments when it seemed like something is floating by in my apartment. I figured it might be floaters in my eye or just that I am tired. I don't feel freaked out or scared.

I wonder if something or someone is trying to get my attention. Well, it has accomplished that. I just don't understand what is being communicated to me.

Isn't it funny, even in the spirit world you can't get straight answers.

Thursday, July 25, 2009

Another week well done. Yesterday I had a small bit on the show. Me in a dress, being compared to Nicky Hilton and Katy Perry who all wore the same dress at one time. It was fun. But I worry at the number of guys who loved my legs. Where are all the girls?!

The evening was even better. I met up with artist Howard Shum, and went to another gathering of the Drink and Draw group. Back in New York I was in a rut creatively. True I had Late Night but outside of the job I wasn't really doing much. I did do a lot of portraits of friends and interns from work, but most of that was done to pass the time while commuting for 2 hours each way, everyday. Also, the art I did for Dragon Con the pass two years were the most creative artwork I did outside of work.

I felt coming to LA would show me the light. And it has so far. Two weeks ago. I went to my first Drink and Draw. Absolutely incredible! A bar filled with illustrators and animators, men, women, professionals, and people who've never held a pen or pencil other than to sign their names. All gathered, drawing, talking, sharing ideas and of course drinking.

This is what I was missing in New York, big time. The only thing that came close to this was going to conventions and walking through the artist alleys.

Watching these folks exchanging thoughts in the room... It was like giving a major jump start to a dead battery. I came home and cleared out the extra room, "my studio", which had started to become storage for boxes that weren't unpacked yet. I've actually started working on a new dot image, one I tried to start 3 years ago but never got pass the pencil stage.

I've only been here about 3 months and I am feeling this kind of energy, I am wondering what it will be like after a year. I am excited!

Sexy Isn't As Sexy As You!

This was an incredible 4th of July. I went to the Los Angeles Anime Expo. Had a great time hung out with artist and friend, who had a booth in the artist alley at the convention. Some day I will try to get a booth at a convention as well.

Going to this convention I had told myself that I would control my buying because comic con is coming up in a few weeks but once there I lost some of my control.

You know I realized the other night while watching a repeat of Sexy In the City, toys are to me what shoes are to Carrie. I've never seen a toy I didn't want to own.

I bought a few really cool items. I should mention I always negotiate price. Full price is a starting point especially if you're buying more than one item from a vendor. There were maybe a couple of people who were fixed on their prices and I usually walk away. It's their lost. At these conventions I am usually one of a few people buying so many items, most people are just looking.

Vendors should welcome negotiations with me!

Among the items bought is a Samurai Sword letter opener that came with a stand. A Ghost in the Shell Tachikoma, blue of course. I plan on actually taking this one out of the box! Tom and Jerry figures in a box that looks like a television set. Also this set of 3 very detailed bunny girl musicians. A couple of french maids to add to the growing collection of maids. And there's this one item called Charisma Sexy. At first it looks like it might be some kind of Japanese drink but upon further studying the package I realized it's not what I thought. So what is it, you're wondering. I took pictures of it and I think I'll let you arrive at the answer on your own.

Footnote, I will not be using this item anytime soon. It's for display... really.

I've also started buying more art prints. There's so many good artist at these conventions. From Howard Shum who's work am a huge fan of, I bought a drawing of drawing of Fay Valentine of Cowboy Bebop. And I discovered the works of an incredible pinup artist named Ismael Rac. He claims he is self taught. Another amazing artist at the expo was Cheng Li. She does portraits of people as anime characters in watercolors. I commissioned her to do one of me. It turn out great!

As always at these conventions, the costumes were amazing. Some people put insane amounts of time creating their costumes while a few other just cut out holes in a paper plate, ran a string through it, tied it around their heads and that was it.

Over all, this convention I'd say is equal to what is going on in New York. Maybe a little bigger is size.

Aside from this recent convention so many things have happened. First off, I am officially a resident of California now. I have a California license! I took the written test and pasted it. I was a little nervous about taking it but I did fine. I would have been pissed had I failed cause people out here can't drive.

Yes, I said it. Californians can't drive.

The majority of drivers on the road out here make New York cabbie look like the safest drivers on the road. It's the norm to make lane changes without signaling. And tail gating is except-able especially when driving over 70 mile an hour on the freeway. When I've had this discussion with natives out here their response is equally as crazy. "If you don't drive at the same speed as the traffic on the freeway of course there will be tail gating. Average speed, 80-90 miles an hour. I kid you not. When I go down to San Diego for Comic Con I might attach my video camera to my dash board and download some of the video. You got to see it to believe it.

I don't understand why the state doesn't seriously crack down on the insanity going on out here.

I am still enjoying be out here though. I don't think I can ever live in the east again. When people are not driving in their cars there is a calmness here that's incredible. It seems like you'd really have to go out of you way to find drama if that's your thing.

Any way, I've posted some pictures on Myspace and Facebook from the anime expo. Looking forward to Comic Con. I'll only be there for the weekend but it should be fun. I will have 2 sexy Amandas out there who are close to my heart. Paradise! I can't ask for more.

----------------------------------------------------

Photos from the Anime Expo will be posted on my pages on Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/people/Pierre-Bernard-Jr/1040283982

and Myspace:
http://www.myspace.com/pbdotman

My First Appearance On The Tonight Show

Looking back on this week, Wednesday was good. I got to do a short bit on the show with Kareem Abdul Jabbar. I can't thank the audience that afternoon enough for the warm reception that I got when I came out. I felt like I was among family.

So now we did a week worth of shows, each one funnier than the day before. Conan did an incredible job, everything worked the way they were rehearsed. I think it's safe to say we're off to a great start.

A Day At Citywalk

Today I discovered the works of an artist I never heard of before. His name is Felix Mas. His work is amazing, I absolutely loved it. You can see in his work the influence of Mucha, Klimt, and Japanese print makers. Some of his paints looked like the illustrations you'd see in old fashion and women magazines from the late 60s and early 70s.

The Art Consultant who was very knowledgeable and equally beautiful, gave me a schooling or I should say some background on Felix. I ended up buying a book on his works though seriously if I could I would have bought a print or two.

This move, the bills never end.

I really love Citywalk. I seem to go there regularly and so far I am never bored. It's such a nice environment to be in. Normally I'm not into these crowd drawing locations but something about this place is actually calming despite all the people.

I feel really inspired.

First Test Show

Today we did out first test show today.

It went well I think. It felt like what we left in New York now in a new environment. I think fans will be very surprise and happy. I have to say the studio is incredible. I hope many of the fans will have the opportunity to come out someday and see it for themselves. It's nothing like the New York studio.

Afterwards we had dinner on the roof balcony. Imagine if you can mountains in the background the sun starting to set. There's no way I could see myself going back to New York. The west coast will most likely be my final resting place someday. Not L.A. but somewhere further south.


Life is really good out here.

(so far)...

The Wound and Wound Toy Co. Is Out Of Business!

Everyone loves you
Nobody cares
An awful collection
Of enemies and friends
Congratulations to you
With sad regrets
I'm tired of the old shit
Let the new shit begin
-The Eels

I guess I am not in New Jersey anymore.

As I write this I am sitting in a room which looks out to the Laurel Canyon Mountains in Los Angeles, California. The room is fill with a few of my favorite toys, Homer and Mr. Burn figures, Bender the robot, my 15" Betty Boop who's always looking away from me. A Batman pez collection, my dancing Snoopy who towards the last few weeks of living in New Jersey would mysteriously start playing the Charlie Brown theme song without anyone activating it.

A couple of times while I was in my bedroom upstairs I would hear it start playing on its own downstairs in the living room. Very strange.

These toys and a few others that weren't packed away into storage are helping me stay sane as I adjust week after week to this new reality. There's no cable or satellite just a radio tuned to 93.1 Jack FM.

The items spread throughout this apartment are the only reminder of the life I had in New Jersey. If I were to say I miss it, I'd be seriously lying. I LOVE IT OUT HERE!

Making this move to Los Angeles was the best thing I could have done with my life at this point in time. I can't thank Conan, Jeff and Tracy enough for asking me to come out here and to continue working as an artist on the Tonight Show.

Getting here wasn't easy though. In fact, moving here was the worst period I've ever had to go through in a while. For one month, day after day, night after night, I packed boxes of all shape and sizes. Well over 300, not counting furniture.

I've lose so much weight from the stress of not eating properly, worrying about whether or not I was making the right decision, could I survive in California, will I have problems with racist cops, hey, I listen to my share of rap by Ice-T and Ice Cube. Will I be able to drive and get around especially on the L.A. freeways. And more importantly where will I be getting my fix of comics and toys now that Midtown Comics and my local Wal-mart weren't here.

And then there are "friends"...

Nothing like a move to help you redefine your "friends". I remember back in late December going into early February before it was final that I was leaving, people I had thought of as friends were telling me how they would be there for me, to help me pack, anything I need, any help at all just call.

It was late or early morning during the last week of February I was sitting on one of my dining room chairs realizing what I had ahead of me and started to panic. Up to that point I had figured packing would take me about a week and a half. I would spend one day packing the living room, next day the kitchen and dining room, another day in my studio, another in my studio, another in my toy room or the View Master room as I called it. And maybe a day and a half in the basement. The remaining time in March would be spent going out to dinner with friends and saying goodbye.

How I was wrong!

Sitting in that chair, a week had gone by, and even though I was spending close to 14 to 18 hours each day packing, only the living room and part of the dining room was done. The Mover came to set a date and when he saw how far I had gotten he even said he didn't think I would make my move date in early April. He was so sure that in the end he sent 8 guys out to move me. Man were they surprised.

Back to my "friends".

I started calling and texting people, the very people who said they'd help, just call, they'd be there. What happened, everyone disappeared. It was like the Twilight Zone. For the month of March not a single phone call or text was return.

2 people did help. Each giving me about a day and a half worth of help which was greatly and deeply appreciated. But otherwise I spent the entire month of March in Jersey packing. waking up early in the morning, body sore, hands totally dry and peeling and barely stopping to eat. Then going to bed early in the moring. Basically getting about 3 to 4 hours of sleep per night. I thought of Charlton Heston in the Ten Commandments, walking through the desert... alone.

During that period there was a lot of paranoia and anger. The paranoia was worrying about if this was the right thing to do, etc. The anger was more toward myself then toward anyone. I always pride myself on my ability to take care of my business myself. I rarely asked for help for anything. But here I was finally in a situation in which I really needed outside help and support. Everyone who called themselves a "friend" were no where to be found. How could I have known so many people but yet know nobody.

In the end though I manage to pull it off. I packed a 3 bedroom house, plus basement and garage alone, right up to the morning of the move on April 5th when the last box was taped close at 7am, 2 hours before the movers arrived. They were shocked to find everything ready to go since they were told it was going to be an all day move.

I was able to meet with a small group of people for dinner before I left. That was nice. A week later, Easter sunday, I moved into this apartment.

I'm happy now.

Now that I am here a lot of things in my life I get to do over. The most obvious are some of the people who refer to themselves as "friends". Am not angry any more. I think if anything they made leaving New York a lot easier for me since they weren't around in the end.

Now I can start to concentrate on my personal artwork more. For the last few years I've been in a rut creatively. I was so busy trying to make people and relationships happy that I neglected my own needs. Not anymore.

I recently read a comment where this person mentioned the luxury of waking up without an alarm clock. The last few weeks I've had just that. Since I am no longer using 4 hours a day commuting. I spend them sleeping.

There are a few people and places I will miss and I am missing now. My family. Granted I didn't see my mother every weekend but knowing she was a train ride and a couple of hours away was comforting.

Corine K. who drove close to 3 hours often to visit me in Jersey and in the end one of the people who helped me pack while dealing with a very sick family member who was in the hospital. I can't thank her enough. (Also, if she's reading this, I have your coat, you're going to have to come to L.A. to get it. I don't do Fed-Ex, see you soon!).

But the biggest withdrawal I am having right now is not having Amanda around. For almost a year now I've been in a really happy, calm place. A few people even noticed. I credit it all to Amanda. She's a topic for a blog unto its self. I think she, without knowing, fixed a lot of things that were wrong with me. And just overall made me a happier person. People ask why I haven't done a Recliner Of Rage in such a long time, I say blame her. Since I've known her I rarely have anything to really write about. Somehow everything gets resolved. I don't know where she fits in my life going into the future now that I live here in L.A. but I can say without a doubt that she has been great for my mental health.

Am sure she'll read this and say, "Oh Lord. Pierre you're crazy!" Yeah am crazy, crazy about you.

There are a lot of good, creative people out here. Future potential for new friends is very high. But I think I will walk that path cautiously this time.

Recently I met someone who has already inspired and has started to give me a kick in the butt to get my artwork started again. In return I am trying to do the same for her. We made an agreement that by years end we will have updated websites and substantial body of creative works to show. This kind of energy was missing and what I needed in New York.

I could have sworn Betty Boop just smiled and looked at me but now she's looking up and away again. I guess she's agreeing with me.

I miss the Strands book store too. Where do you go to find old, new and strange art books all in one place.

Not far from me is this place called Universal Citywalk. Lots of fun. It's like a walking mall next to Universal's amusement park. It has a few great stores in there. Among them, Magnet Max, Sparky's and Things From Another World. So far it's the best place I've found for comics and toys though the store is on the small side.

I've yet to find anything like Midtown Comics or Jim Hanley's Universe in New York. Where are the good, no, GREAT places for comics and toys out here.

All these interesting stores are kind of grouped together but at the other end of the mall was a store called Wound and Wound Toy Co. They sold all kind of wind up toys. I loved the place. I knew if I moved out here, it was going to be a place I'd visit often. I even took pictures inside the store.

Last week after work I went to Citywalk for sushi and afterwards headed to Wound and Wound. It was closed, gone, out of business. In its place a flip flop store will be opening. I guess this can be added to the list of sad regrets.

I hear my drafting table calling out to me and on that note I'll stop here. It's time to start creating art. Besides I am not going to let my new friend beat me in starting the artistic presentations.

I LOVE L.A.!

(so far...)

Believe In Me

Wouldn't it be a great world if you could believe in people. Was there ever a time when you could believe in people emotions as being truthful. And if so, what happen. These days I am so tired and stressed that I have developed amazing powers of paranoia. I can see right through people. Yes. I can see bull shit as if it was a turd flowing right out of one's mouth trying to disguise itself as honesty with pretty colors.

All things start out with the best intentions. "Believe In Me", is the battle cry. Too bad it's the one war that doesn't have a positive out come.

Damn, I've gone abstract!

Oxford Comma

I don't know, maybe it is stress that's working it's way through my mind at the moment or it could be I am just getting sick of hearing people say I am not sure if am going.

What am I talking about. Los Angeles of course. I thought by now people would have dropped the silly answer when asked whether or not they are going to L.A. Only a limited number of people were lucky enough to be ask to go, and that alone should be a good reason to say with pride they are going. Not to mention the fact that jobs aren't exactly falling out of trees at the moment.

But lets not forget what they will be a part of. It's the Tonight Show. Aside from SNL, it's a television staple. The chance to work on such a show doesn't come often and may likely be a once in your life time event.

Why would this be a topic worth writing about. Well it's starting to drive me crazy each time people ask me do I know if such and such made up their mind to go yet.

Trust me, if they are walking around right now telling you they are not sure, they're not being truthful. Everyone knew way back in April of '08 if they wanted to to go or not. At this point the only way you wouldn't want to go is if you weren't ask to go. Period.

O'k, maybe that's a comma, since I know of a couple of people who were asked recently but knew well in advance, again since last year, that they didn't want to or couldn't go.

This is an adventure. A scary ass, what the fuck am I doing adventure. Get off the drama train and be happy that you're about to take part in television history.

Wow, I don't believe I just wrote that. So what's really bothering me?...

hmmmm.......

Toys

Last night I ate at a vegetarian restaurant which turned out to be a nice surprise since I've never been there before. The place is called "Home On 8th". It's on 8th avenue near Penn station, a neighborhood peppered with bars and sexy lingerie/dvd stores.

It amazing how you can live in New York and still discover new and interesting places. Last Sunday was another perfect example. I was walking along 2nd avenue going towards St. Marks Place and came across this incredible Japanese toy store, Toy Tokyo. I thought I had died and went to Japanese anime toy heaven.

The store owner claimed they've been in business for over 10 years. How could I have not known about this place in all that time. There were many things worth buying in there but I had to show self control. Since anything I buy now would have to be included in my move. As it stands I will be paying a fortune to move and store the bulk of my toy collection since I will have to rent a small apartment in L.A. to start.

Only a month and a half left before change begin. In a couple of weeks I will head out to L.A. to lock down an apartment, then return to New York, start packing and move out hopefully by the end of March.

I can't help but wonder what the toys and comic shop will be like out there. When I was in San Francisco a couple of years ago with Late Night, after tapings, a friend of mine, Lizzy, took me to some amazing stores in that area. I ended up shipping a hugh box back to New York. Funny, now it's all heading back, out west.

I think this weekend I'll take some finally pictures of my place as it is for memory sake and then start boxing stuff.

As much as I want to do this move I can't help but wonder if this is the right move to make. Will I be happy out there. Will living out there be a positive experience. What new friends will come into my life. What old ones will move on.

One thing for sure, good or bad experiences, there will be new toys and comics stores to discover.

...at least I hope there will be.

Something Has Changed

Have you ever had a period in your life where something seems wrong but you can't quite put your finger on it. It's like you've woken up in an alternate life. All the people are the same but behaviors are different.

Do you confront it or just go along with the new reality and see where it goes.

It's hard to believe only 3 more weeks left and then Late Night with Conan O'Brien is no more, It will be The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien! He's going to be great and I am happy I've been given a chance to be a part of it.

"I gave Them life
I gave Them all
They drained my very soul
...dry
I crushed my heart
to ease Their pains
No thought for me remains there
Nothing can They spare
What of me?

It could be that nerves are just starting to act up. The reality of what I am about to do with my life. Or, I might be right. The world has changed and the aliens are hoping I won't notice.

Remember Dark City?....

It's Crappy Out There!

Right now am sitting here at home this morning waiting for conditions to improve or I should say hoping to improve. Overnight it snowed and waking up this morning at 6:30am it is now and icy mix falling. The ground out side looks like a ice skating rink. Not the best condition for driving. I tried driving in this once a year ago and got into a minor accident. I have no desire of repeating that moment in time.

It's frustrating. I really don't like taking time off unless I really have to. But with weather like this, it doesn't really leave you with much choice. Am going to give it a couple of more hours and then if it still looks bad, I have no choice but to call in and stay home.

And if there was ever a period in time that I didn't want to be stuck at home, this is it. So much to get done. Yesterday was an average good work day. We taped two shows. I did have one really crazy encounter with a staff member though. She flew off the handle like one of those crazy homeless people you'd encounter roaming the streets. She just kept going on and on trying to engage me in her craziness but I just didn't say a word and that unfortunately made her even worst.

To tell the truth, it didn't even phase me. Right now am like a guy who knows he's moving on to something better and no longer has to put up with other people insanity. Though I did find out later that she might be one of the people who wasn't asked to go to L.A., it still doesn't excuse the behavior.

All these years we got along fine and now towards the end to start behaving in this manner. Crazy, I call it.

Aside from work, what was on my mind most of the day was the girlfriend, and of course moving.

It's hard to make sense of online listings without actually being able to see what people are renting out. I've seen some really great listings and a few lemons. Plus I can't do anything during the day, at least not yet till Late Night is over on February 20th. Then I'll fly out for a week and really look for a apartment. Come back and move by the end of March.

Not a lot of time to make such a huge transition. I guess in some way this is best cause by then it's going to be a quick break from New York. No long drawn out departure.

Well, it's 9:02 and it still looks crappy outside. But I am going to give it a try. Cross your fingers and wish me luck. At moments like this you wish you had wealth. Then you could just slip right back under the bed covers and say "Fuck It!"

Later.

I've Been Anally Probed

I was knocked out and probed...

Willingly.

What a way to start a blog. Admitting to being probed in such a manner. But it did happened and I am happier for it.

I had a Colonoscopy. One which was long over due. Everything went well though the doctor did find 4 small polyps which he removed. I won't say it was a close call but I am glad they were found now as oppose to a later date.

My dad died of this cancer 13 years ago, so I'm on the must watch list.

So before I go any further here, I say to all my friends, fans and aliens, if you have members in your family that have or had colon cancer, get check. Forget that age thing and get pass the fear of the probe.

Take care of your business.

So welcome to my blog. This is totally new to me so hang in there as I try to figure out my way around this.

I guess what I will be doing here is sharing my thoughts with you as I am about to take on the biggest change of my life. If you are not aware, I am about to leave my birth coast, New York and move out to Los Angeles, California.

The Late Night staff have offered me the opportunity to go to the west coast and continue working with Conan. I can't begin to express how happy and excited I am. I've been working on Late Night since the beginning, the people for the most part are an extended family. And it's great to know that I will be continuing on with most of them.

But with every great news there is equally bad.

I've fallen in love.

It's weird for me to actually see myself typing these words. In my past I've dated a few people that I really cared for but always felt something was missing. In the last few months this person has filled in a void in my heart. A place that has always been empty and I never really expected it to be filled. It's one of those things in life you just come to except that that's the way it will away be.

So as you can imagine, this move as much as I want to do it, isn't going to be easy and it might come at a huge price to me.

Leaving New York has always been a goal of mine for years. Well before working for Late Night. It's one of those I was born here, don't want to die here things. So in some way, Late Night has saved me. I hope that maybe someday she'll wake up and feel the same and decide to join me. But it's a major decision for anyone to make. And I will always respect and care about her no matter what she decides.

Hopefully in May I will be talking about how great the California sun is and how wonderful it is to have --------- still in my life.

or....